Nude

Don't let your hair down, let me take you in, all your curves and every inch of your skin

You criminal, you've stolen my eyes and my heart yet again

Hamster, I long for the moment out when our lips touch once more.

You're still in my veins

I fiend for you even after this long hiatus.

My drug, my pusher

Never stop getting me high

Let me overdose on you

I'll be fine

Let me pass out being high on you and wake up only to start again

You are perfectly rolled, lit just right, you never died out

I smoke you till the very tip

Lick my lips afterwards, I want to remember the taste for eternity

I'm an addict and I refuse to stop

Evils.

My Dearest Hamster,

I made you doubt, I filled you head with uncertainty. Even if for only the most fleeting of moments, the thought of me let doubt spring up it's ugly head.

Forgive me.

Do not do so if only to save me from drowning in this ocean of guilt, I will not accept it.

I will acknowledge your forgiveness, if it comes with the possibility of us still fighting to keep our flame alive.

Naïve, innocently so, under the impression that this was it, us both battling the frustration the distance between us birthed.

Now I know that the battle rages on deep into the relationship as well.

I smile at the challenge.

The thought of other things keeping me from my hamster is humorous.

How dare they think they can succeed?

When oceans couldn't kill the flame of love that burns fiercely within my heart,

What gave the evils of this earth the impression that anything after this would put out this flame?

However, these evils will have their own time to be defeated, what stands before is the evil of doubt that I myself allowed to rare it's head.

And so again I plead, forgive me, and let us keep on this long and trying road.

We may not see it now, but I know there will be a light ahead.

God is not so cruel as to not allow our love be actualised.

Yours always 

Ade

Hamsters Letter - 4

My Dearest Hamster,

It gladdens my heart to know you have found your happiness.

A light of sadness still glows at the thought that I couldn't be the reason for your joy.

It will be put out soon enough.

So refrain from thinking of me.

Forget me altogether.

Chase happiness, let me see you smile, because in turn, I derive the faintest bit of joy from the rays of your happiness.

I'm not so petty as to be downcast that you chose to forget me.

In all honesty, you gave me more days than I ever thought I'd have. 

However, on this side of the earth, where the air is different,

You still litter the streets of my mind.

Litter away my love.

Only your footprints on the sandy shores of my mind.

I refuse to give up on the memories I have with you.

I only have these memories.

In them I've found shelter.

In them lies the only way I can be with you.

I'm wrapped in a blanket of melancholic joy.

So I'm pleading with you, allow me to still hold on to these memories.

Do not tear away my blanket.

I can promise, to not send you anymore letters,

I'll write them and pretend you know what words I put down.

Feel free to let my memories ashes blow out of your mind,

I'll hold no grudge against you for this.

I always knew happy endings were far-fetched.

But I'll nurture the ember of optimising that glows bright for us,

Gently blow at it, keep it glowing, for this world or the next.

There will come a time for the flame of our love to burn bright.

I'll love you till then and beyond.

Yours always,

Ade.

Hamsters Letter - 3

My Dearest Hamster,

My faith in our dreams has grown faint. 

My interest in you remains, as though every morning when I wake, I meet you again for the first time.

The distance between us scares me.

My heart has sunk to the darkest pits of my belly.

I know other men aren't blind to your beauty.

Please forgive me if I sound as though I'm doubting your feelings towards me.

Not at all my dear. 

But if a man other than myself, wakes the butterflies that lay sleeping in your belly, I would not hold it against you if you let him fill the space I've left empty.

That thought keeps me up at night.

It is what I deserve.

Squandering what little time we shared.

Allowing misplaced jealousy to take control of my judgement.

Alas, I can not change what has already happened.

But if this is the last time I can confidently say I still have you,

You must know what I feel for you may have already transcended beyond the mediocrity of love.

Yours always,

Ade.